Erin Andrews

Well, my bracket is shot to shit, oh well. Fucking tOSU and Kansas just lose already.

And without further ado Erin Andrews, she was at the Capital One Bowl, I saw her on the big screen then I went on the look out. Yeah, I found her!!! She can move too, haulin that ass all around the side lines -- great reporter too!

Enjoy

St. Patty's Day ShitShow

Well it was going to be another regular ho-hum Saturday afternoon, down in Boca for a drink by the pool but Adam called, he needed help moving items out of his old apartment and into his storage unit. I have a truck, so I get the call. Blake said he would help so it wouldn't take forever - thanks Blake! So after we moved Adam's stuff to storage in Delray, I showed Blake my new place EPS Manor! I hope you're sitting down because this is where the story goes from ho-hum to HOLY FUCKING SHIT, YOU FOR REAL?!?!!?!?!?!!?!?

So Blake and I drive from EPS Manor to McDonalds (half block away) on Federal & Linton in Delray, we pulled into the parking lot and saw a horse drawn carriage trotting down Federal Highway (southbound). We parked facing Federal Highway and saw this dude laying down and saw a chick opposite him bending over and wondered why? All of the sudden her head comes up and BOOM turns out she was blowing him. Oh not to mention the other couple in the carriage, they were how do I put this - slapin skins, bumpin uglies, fucking!

This has now been put on my list of things to do with a lady!

Now onto the pictures from St. Patrick's Day -- they are in chronological order.

Marley wanted to come out with us!

Who wants the lime green mustache ride.

Who wants a group picture? We do! We do!

I swear, I did not die the beard orange; it's 100% natural.

Who wants to sex the leprechaun?


Seriously, like I was going to not take a picture of that ass in that skirt. It was discussed by the crew that was there if the ass made the skirt or the skirt made the ass. Determined that the skirt made the ass. I bet you want to know how I managed to take that picture with her 5 feet away, well my friends it takes practice. You see that green shirt and arm on the left -- that is Adam's girlfriend and he is on the left of her. Yeah I offered to take a picture of them, and slide the camera to the right for the ass! There, it's now like the magic trick has been revealed.

I would have loved to kiss them because they were Irish for the day... EPS loves the blonde's, proven fact you can look it up.

They saw me, and wanted a picture, who am I to turn down the ladies, especially the one who nibbles. Since I have two hands and there were two nice asses for me to rest my hands on... why we are at it, yes, yes, self, yes, probably!

Yep, rock stars and my witness to the Delray porno event mentioned above!

Yeah, below appears to be my drunken drive home picture face. It's kinda like my go to move.

Dancin Fool

Oh yeah, I can cut the rug like no other, chick to the left, yeah that's the art dealer intellectual woman (I'm working on an epic piece about the wedding ); I hate them just for the fact that unlike strippers who are gone the next morning (from your mind, you sick fuck) intellectual one's stay there, they set up shop, they camp out.

I haven't had to deal with that in three years thank you very much and I'm not in the mood for that shenanigans.

ONE SHINNING MOMENT

1ST ANNUAL EPSKNOWS
BRACKET CHALLENGE

So it is that glorious time of year again where the fine folks at Deadspin provide there team by team break down. So comprehensive it's not funny, written by people who know their teams inside and out. I learned all about Bucky, his real name and why they are called Badgers.

So here is my official for the money bracket.

My Final Four for those of you who don't want to click the above link. Florida over Southern Illinois in one semi-final and Georgetown over Texas A&M in the other.

FLORIDA OVER GEORGETOWN IN THE FINALS.

I'll have more later, just wanted to stop in for a little punch and pie. I'm off to go wait for the games to start in about 5-6 hours.

Welcome to my new home, now wipe your dirty ass feet!

FRONT DOOR ENTRY


KITCHEN (FROM LIVING ROOM)


LIVING ROOM (FROM KITCHEN)


OUT THE BACK


MY LAUNDRY ROOM WITH FULL SIZE WASHER & DRYER


So I am walking with the sale's woman taking pictures when outside is this smokin hot brunette in tight workout pants and green sports bra; walking her dog. The sale's woman noticed my attention was diverted and mentioned that the brunette lives across from me out my front door. She said "they" so I don't know if it's brunette & dog or brunette and dude...

But we shall see in less then a month. I am soliciting color ideas for my walls. A light blue, some reds, perhaps a light metal looking finish to compliment the appliances, I do know that I need to paint the stairway to heaven a lighter color because very little natural light will be shinning in daily. Also might get a puppy or two cute little kittens, cats are great because you can leave them alone for a day or two and they can go to the bathroom inside their litter box and eat on their own, whereas dogs are great but have to be walked.

Comparing the era's

This line is an instant classic, and I wish I could take credit for it:

I might be alone here, but, as a purist, I think fake boobs have roided-up today's breast-ogling game. Babe Ruth didn't get drunk staring at plastic tits. Ted Williams didn't hit .406 by playing with fake funbags. And natural breasts were good enough for Hank Aaron, so they're good enough for me.

or fake ones...